When Pleasing Others Is Hurting You: Finding God's Patterns for Healthy Relationships - Cover may vary

This book was recommended by my friend who also happens to be a therapist and it has been a true lifesaver! I was drowning in the pain and frustration of guilt I created in myself from constantly enabling friends and family and allowing toxic relationships to continue. She assigned this as homework and it ended up saving my sanity and my life. Exactly what I needed!

I found this to be a really great look at what has to be a common problem, but a seemingly rarely discussed one. For anyone whose tendency is to be the peace-maker/keeper, it's a thorough explanation of how that may have come to be for you, the problems it can create, and a look at how to change the mindset surrounding the "need to please". It tends to be targeted at women, however the author himself discusses his own struggles with codependency as it's called, so I'd say it can be easily applied to anyone.

There are a lot of other peoples personal experiences. I would have liked more advice or ideas.More references from the Bible. A lot was hard to follow- reading about people- patients?

Granted, I'm only 1/2 way finished, but within the first 2 chapters I was making some SERIOUS life/attitude/perception changes. I like being a giver, someone EVERYone can depend on (including myself). I tend to think, "At some point in time these people will come around and be there for me, too!" But often times, at the end of the day I just feel spent. Too tired for anyone, including my self. This book has helped me gain a clearer Godly perspective on the people in my life, recognizing patterns that are both healthy & unhealthy, and I've learned how to begin a healthy change so at the end of the day I feel I've done well for myself, as well.If you are the kind of person who tends to depend on others, I would like to recomend this book to you, as well so that you may see how your needyness and co-dependancy effects those who care for you.

David Hawkins is a ground breaking therapist who empowers those who have been people pleasers and who have been victimized by others. The information and way of thinking in this book will change your life if you have had trouble with being around or in relationship with selfish people, narcissistic people, takers, mockers, and people in general who are aggressive about gaining for themselves while harming others. Truly life changing.

This book largely applies to women in terms of examples and situations that this book uses to make it's point .I think that this can be a very helpful read to those that seek it out, and I certainly do not feel that my time or money was wasted in reading this book; however, I believe that it was slightly mis-leading by not clearly stating that it was catered towards women.PSA I am not stating that women are more likely to be co-dependent, weaker in relationships, or anything of that nature. With that said I feel that this particular book applies moreso to women than men.

It's a great book for those who have suspected they are not fulfilling their own lives but those of others.I think it's a good way into the subject; and really soothing. There are others to progress to from here that are more pragmatic on what to do next.

Best book on codependent relationships from a Christian perspective. Will be reading more from this author. My husband is reading this as well to understand why I am the way I am and why I want to change

The thing which is not mentioned in the description or the reviews is that this book is 100% religion. It's about what God wants you to do, quoting from gospels and scriptures on every page if not in every paragraph. That's not, itself, a bad thing but that was not referenced anywhere before I bought the book and that makes it a very different book to the one advertised.

Having seen David Hawkins in a very moving live conference at the high age of 92, I was curious about his earlier works.This is a man worth studying-with amazing experience in the field of psychoogy,kinesiology and co-dependency.The book is a very thorough collection of themes and case studies-all to do with Co-Dependency. This includes children, parents and other life shaping relationships that make up our psychological structure.D.Hawkins has many suggestions how to get out of damaging relationships which lack healthy boundaries or have none at all-caused by a nearly compulsive need to please others rather than be truthful to one's own SELF.Excellent for anybody for whom this rings a bell :-))

This book arrived really quickly and in good condition. Although I haven't managed to get round to reading it all yet, I think it is a really good book .I was amazed at one section which described me, how I used to think about myself and life, and my worries of what other people thought . This also showed me how much I have changed over the last few years and what I can still work on.

Very easy to reed and very well written. I found it helpful and made me thinking in a way that has been constructive and positive. Good book.

Thank you